Over the past week, I asked this simple question.
We talk almost every day about change, agility, results, crises, deadlines, pressure, culture, and leadership. When I asked the question, the answers reminded me how rarely people are surprised by big things. They do not need a spectacular overnight transformation, nor a perfect leader.
What seems to pleasantly surprise them most is what should, in fact, be the foundation: open communication, support, clarity, trust, and humanity.
Some of the answers came in a joking, half-joking, or perhaps completely honest tone:
“Very little can pleasantly surprise me these days.”
That made me pause, because behind that sentence there is often not cynicism, but fatigue: fatigue from constantly having to prove oneself, from reading between the lines, from questions being interpreted as attacks, and from mistakes being experienced as danger.
- “It would pleasantly surprise me if people stopped pretending to be busy.”
Busyness is often a socially acceptable way of saying: “I matter.” In many teams, busyness is used as protection.
Somatically, constant busyness often keeps the body in a state of mobilization: adrenaline, tension, shallow breathing, the feeling that “there is no time.” This can last for a while, but in the long run, people cannot live and work in constant activation without consequences.
- “It would pleasantly surprise me if someone replied to an email clearly, briefly, and on time.”
It may sound small, but in practice, for many people it would be a big surprise. Clear communication reduces tension, and a timely response reduces guesswork.
We often think that relationships are built through big conversations, development programs, workshops, and strategies. And they are. But relationships are also built through small, everyday signals: replying to an email, making a clear agreement, respecting people’s time.
- “It would pleasantly surprise me if success were not measured by who stayed in the office the longest.”
This answer stayed with me in particular because, in many systems, there is still an unspoken assumption that presence equals commitment, and exhaustion is proof of loyalty. But it is not. Success is not measured by the number of hours spent at a desk, but by the quality of decisions, the clarity of priorities, the results achieved, and the relationships we build.
From a somatic perspective, the body shows very quickly when we are living in a culture of constant proving. The shoulders tighten. The breath becomes shallow. The nervous system enters a state of alertness. A person may appear functional, but internally they are operating from tension, not presence.
- “It would pleasantly surprise me if someone did not take a question as an attack.”
This is one of those answers that sounds simple, but says a lot. In a healthy team, a question is a tool for understanding, while in an unsafe team, a question becomes a threat.
“Why did we decide this way?” / “What is our priority?” / “Could we do this differently?” / “What is actually happening here?”
In one environment, these questions create space for a better decision. In another, they trigger defensiveness.
- “It would pleasantly surprise me if honesty were not punished in a team.”
Can an employee say: “I am overloaded,” “This deadline is not realistic,” “I do not agree with this decision,” or “I need support,” without it being perceived as weakness, resistance, or a lack of motivation?
In many systems, people have learned that it does not pay to be honest, because honesty can earn them a label: difficult, negative, problematic, not flexible enough. If honesty is punished, the team loses access to reality, and a leader without access to reality makes decisions based on an image, not on the truth.
My conclusion
When I look at all these answers together, I see one common thread: people are not asking for perfect organizations, but for healthier contact.
From my perspective as a somatic and leadership coach, these are not only communication topics. They are nervous system topics. A business environment is not just a set of processes, goals, and structures, but a collection of bodies that enter meetings, emails, deadlines, conflicts, unspoken expectations, and power dynamics every day.
