Recently, Balance2Business hosted an exclusive event – an enlightening lecture by renowned Harvard psychiatrist Frank Anderson during which the topic of gaslighting emerged.
I don’t know how many of you know that Merriam-Webster, America’s oldest dictionary publisher, chose “gaslighting” as its word of the year last year. Since it is increasingly prevalent today, understanding, recognizing, and addressing it is crucial. Here, I would like to shed light on the concept of gaslighting, its contemporary manifestations and strategies to cope with it.
Gaslighting refers to a manipulative tactic where an individual seeks to undermine someone’s perception of reality, causing them to question their sanity or memory. It is a subtle form of emotional abuse that can have severe consequences on one’s mental and emotional well-being.
In today’s interconnected world, gaslighting has found new ways to manifest itself. You may have huge business and life experience, education and reputation and wonder how this might happen to you. Unfortunately, it can happen to anyone. Recognizing that you may be experiencing gaslighting is crucial to protecting your mental and emotional well-being.
Here are some signs and indicators that someone might be a victim of gaslighting:
- Constant doubt – Do you frequently question your thoughts, feelings, or memories? Are you doubting your abilities, judgment, or competence? Do you feel less confident or capable than you did before a particular relationship?
- Inability to trust your own perceptions – Are you finding it difficult to trust your instincts or intuition?
- Contradicting statements – Have you noticed a consistent pattern of someone contradicting their own statements or denying things they’ve said? Is there a lack of consistency in the information provided to you?
- Withholding information – Is there a pattern of important information being withheld from you? Do you feel like you’re not being kept informed about relevant details?
- Feeling confused – Do you find it challenging to make decisions due to conflicting information?
How do we cope with this? Well, it is not easy.
- Trust your intuition – If something feels off, trust your instincts. Gaslighters often attempt to make you doubt your perceptions.
- Maintain boundaries – Establish and enforce healthy boundaries to protect yourself from manipulation.
- Seek support – Share your experiences with friends, family, colleagues or coaches to gain perspective and support.
What can leaders do?
- Promote education – Raise awareness about gaslighting to empower others to recognize and address it.
- Encourage open communication – Foster environments that encourage open dialogue and respect for diverse perspectives.
- Advocate for mental health – Promote mental health initiatives and destigmatize seeking professional help.
