As a somatic and leadership coach, I often notice one pattern that appears in almost every team, relationship, and organization – assumptions. They are quiet, invisible, and extremely powerful. What is most interesting is that people rarely notice the moment when they stop communicating and start assuming.
At the beginning, it is important to make a clear distinction between assumptions and prejudices.
An assumption arises when we do not have enough information, yet our mind fills in the gaps anyway. We do not ask, verify, or explore. Instead, we create an entire movie in our heads.
A prejudice goes one step further. It is an already formed belief about someone or something, often based on past experiences, fear, or collective narratives.
An assumption is a moment; a prejudice is a pattern. However, both share the same root: insecurity and fear.
Why are assumptions dangerous?
Assumptions are especially present in business environments. Paradoxically, they slip in most easily precisely where meetings, structures, and professional communication rules exist.
This happens when we begin to mix the professional with the personal. And that is how a story is created without facts, verification, or conversation.
In the Balkan context, this is particularly pronounced. Our professional relationships often carry a strong personal dimension. We quickly shift from professional to emotional interpretations of situations. An assumption almost always carries a hidden message: “Maybe someone is against me.”
People often assume others’ behavior based on what they themselves would do. If I wouldn’t reply to a message, it would mean I’m angry and so I conclude that the other person must be angry too.
Our brain seeks certainty, and assumptions provide a false sense of control. However, the cost is high. In doing so, we:
- lose curiosity,
- close communication,
- make decisions without real insight.
Coaching has brought me one powerful realization: every time I assumed, I stopped exploring and without exploration, there is no real understanding, insight, or growth.
Assumptions close space, while curiosity opens it.
These are the questions I often share with my clients and with myself. When you feel you have reached a conclusion about a situation or a person, pause and ask yourself:
- What are the facts?
- What is my interpretation?
- What else could be true?
- What would the curious version of me do?
These questions bring the body back into regulation and open space for leadership grounded in awareness rather than assumptions.
